your wedding day

hey guys! today i want to talk about your wedding day! did you know that my wedding day was a nightmare? i literally woke up the next morning thinking, "man, i'm so glad that was just a bad dream!" and then i realized that it wasn't a dream, and in fact, everything had gone terribly wrong. i used to feel really awful and guilty about feeling that way about my wedding, but the more i've talked to other people, the more i've realized that i'm not the only one who had those feelings about their wedding day. rarely do i hear stories of people who had a perfect wedding. but i'll be honest, pretty sure our story takes the cake.

i'll tell you all about it after the jump!

steve and i got married during the worst snow storm DC had seen for a century. at about ten PM the night before the big day, the washington DC temple called and told us they would be closed due to the weather, and we would have to reschedule. that's the last thing a bride-to-be wants to hear. we had family flown in from across the country, and some even came out from hawaii! and we were leaving on a twelve night caribbean cruise the following monday, and we would prefer that we were married before then. so we started making phone calls. we had to find someone else to perform the marriage, and we would have to pick him up on our way to our own wedding. and instead of an 11:00 ceremony, we had to be there as early as possible. my brother and steve were up until one AM shoveling snow that night, and by the time we woke up, there was a fresh seven inches, and it was still coming down. i was beyond stressed the morning of. i felt so nervous and sick, and i looked awful because i hadn't gotten any sleep. it took hours to get to the temple, and when we got there, found out my brother and his wife were stranded on 395.

the actual ceremony was wonderful. i can't complain about that. being there with steve, in a room full of people that loved us enough to brave the storm, was of course, unforgettable. that was the calmest i felt all day, and i realized that was the only part of the day that mattered. after the ceremony, i finally felt like i would survive whatever else came next.

well, nothing else really came. our venue for the wedding brunch cancelled, and we had to cancel our reception. i cut my cake in jeans and a t-shirt. i never got to hold my wedding bouquet, my bridesmaids didn't get to wear their handmade dresses. there was no dancing, no party, no photographer. all the work we had done setting up chairs and tables, making centerpieces, designing invitations was a waste. that was the saddest part for me. i tried to stay positive, but the whole time i just wanted to go in my room and cry.

at the end of the day, we had to have our family follow us to our hotel to make sure we didn't get stuck in the snow on the way there. which we did, and they had to push us out. by the time we got to the hotel, the restaurant was closed, so we had nothing to eat. the next morning, we had a dozen messages from people telling us they couldn't fly out, and needed our help, or wondering how we were doing, etc. we just wanted to be left alone, but since our cruise didn't leave until the next day, we had to go back to my parent's house.

monday morning, we got on our ship, and were finally alone. we relaxed, ate, watched movies, went to sleep...and then i threw up all night long. romantic, eh?

so that's my wedding story. was it a horrible, miserable, awful day? no, of course not. but it was something that was really hard for me to think about for a long time. honestly, i couldn't look at wedding pictures without feeling sad for months. and it was hard, because i mean, it's your wedding day! i had these visions of what my wedding day would be like for years, and it turned out nothing like what i had hoped for. but like everyone always tells me when they hear what happened, at least i've got a good story to tell. and i am thankful for the people who put so much effort into making it special, even if it didn't turn out. looking back, steve and i have realized that if we could do it over again, we would probably do it the same way. meaning, we would only want our closest friends and family there anyway (but we would get rid of the stress, snow, and anxiety involved).

so, now that i've blabbed on about my wedding day, i want to hear about yours! was it everything you dreamed of? was it stressful? were you nervous? big or small reception? any unforeseen disasters happen? what was the best part? the worst part? the unexpected parts? i want to hear it all!


Ace and Waleena...Two people, actually said...

Elise with a snow shovel is one of the most beautiful brides I have ever seen!

xxoo, J.

Ruth said...

My wedding day went pretty much as planned, although I do think I probably would've done things a little differently if I could do it over. For example, in between the wedding and reception we had a luncheon at Matt's parents house. That wasn't that great for me. Maybe everyone else enjoyed it, I dunno. But, I think it would've been nicer if we had done something different, maybe lunch with just the two of us.
My whole experience with my dress was horrible and stressful, but that was all pre-wedding day stuff. The actual day of the wedding it was fine. I won't go into all the details, but it still annoys me that my mom paid so much money for a dress and then even more money to get it altered and it didn't fit me that well or turn out how I wanted. I mean, it was the dress I wanted, but the alterations weren't done to my expectations.
Matt and I were both more tired than I would've liked, but is there anyone out there that sleeps really well the night before their wedding?
The temple sealing was amazing. Thanks heavens for that, because that really is the most important part of the day. I originally only wanted immediate family at that, but Matt's family had friends they thought would be offended if we didn't invite them. So, we had some friends there too, and it turned out fine. I ended up feeling like it was such a wonderful experience that I'm glad we had a good group of people there to witness and share in the joy.
I wasn't too concerned with the details of our reception. It seemed fine to me, so if I could do it over I would've done that the same. It was at your house, so you might know better than me how it went, at least as far as behinds the scenes stuff...
One last sad thing, it was rainy that day, so we didn't get any pictures afterward on the temple grounds. Guess you can relate to that. But anyway, overall it was a good day. It's the day I married my wonderful husband, probably the best thing I ever did, so of course thinking about that day makes me smile.

annie said...

You know, my wedding day really went pretty smoothly. There were only a few things that I now think back on that I kind of wish had been different. First is that when we picked up my bouquets that morning they were not at all the color that I had chosen. I wanted them to be a deep coral and they were like orange...literally. The only other thing was that when we got our cake I had wanted little pearls around each tier along with the ribbon and there weren't any (but I have to add, that our cake was seriously the most delicious wedding cake I have ever tasted so I didn't care all that much). It's really not much compared to a blizzard, but you know how it is... I just look at the pictures with my bouquets and think: yeah, they're definitely orange. Oh well. You're absolutely right; the most important thing was that I married the love of my life, I was surrounded by people that we love, and our ceremony in the temple is something that I will never forget. And the honest truth is that no matter the circumstances, or how much money or time you put into it, it's just one day and there's no way that it's going to go exactly the way that you want.

elise said...

amen, sister. i think the main issue i have with mine, isn't even the blizzard and all that. my only major regret is that i wish i had been more...assertive, i guess. i think i was caring way too much about making other people comfortable and happy, and not focusing on what steve and i actually wanted. but yeah...it's one day. i hate that there's so much pressure resting on a measly twenty four hours. the tough thing is that no matter what people tell you, there's no way to know or understand any of this until after it's happened.