relationships: worst dates

Claire Awaits Phi

hey guys! i'm so excited to start talking about relationships, and to kick things off, why not talk about the worst date you've ever had! pretty sure this was a recurring theme in my single days, so i may just have to revisit this topic multiple times. there is one instance that stands out from all the rest, though...

so, i was a freshman in college, waiting for two of my neighbors to arrive at the on-campus eatery and join me for dinner, as was the norm. i almost always got there before them, and normally, if i had to wait by myself, i would try to call one of my sisters, so i didn't look like a loser eating by myself. in this case, none of them answered, so i sat down with my food at a table near the TV, hoping that i looked like i didn't want to be bothered. apparently, i wasn't convincing enough, because next thing i know, some random dude taps me on the shoulder and asks, "are you single?" a little taken aback, i respond, "yes" (like an idiot), and he proceeds to ask me for my number, which i give to him (like an idiot).as i'm reciting my phone number, my two friends show up, which makes the experience all the more awkward (especially since they were male). anyway, he leaves, i get teased, and dread the coming weekend.

a few days later, he calls and he asks me if i want to go to the basketball game with him. as you may or may not know, i'm a huge USU basketball fan, so i'm like, "alright, it can't be that bad, at least we'll be doing something i actually like." so i say yes. then he asks me if i want to meet him there, or if i want a ride. i tell him i don't have a car, so i'd have to walk there, and he's like, "okay, well i'm going early, so we can get good seats, so i'll just meet you there." uhh...what? so, friday night i start walking in the cold to the spectrum where the game's going to be. lucky for me, my sister and brother-in-law are on their way to the game as well, and happened to pass me in their car. confused, because they knew i had a date that night, they pull over, and ask me what i'm doing wandering the streets. when i tell them, they laugh at me, and offer me a ride. so i get to the game, find my date, sit down, and he introduces me to his best friend, who's sitting on my left. a girl. so it's me, goober, and his best friend, who is female.

since things are awkward, i start trying to make conversation with goober, asking him what he's studying, where he's from, etc. etc. instead of asking me the same questions, he blurts out, "so, how'd you get that scar between your eyes?" a little taken aback, i tell him i tripped down the stairs holding a pencil when i was two. he laughs, and then repeats (yells across me) the story to his bestie. since it's loud, she keeps asking him to repeat what he's saying. i'm between them, and apparently was getting in the way. in order to resolve that issue, goober grabs my head, pushes it down, and continues his conversation. seriously.

so after what seems like hours of agony, the game ends, and he asks if i'm hungry. yes, i was starving, but i'm like, "you know what, i'm supposed to meet my sister after this, sorry..." so he takes me home. at the door, he asks me what i think of him. who does that? i say i had fun, and he tells me he'll call me tomorrow, and to watch out for pretzels. completely confused, i smile awkwardly, let myself into the apartment, and proceed to tell my roommates everything. it takes me a few days to realize that he must have thought i got the scar between my eyes by tripping down the stairs with a pretzel.

he calls on monday, and i make up some lame excuse as to why i can't go out with him. i spend the rest of the semester avoiding him, and am relieved when i go home for the summer. until i come back in the fall, and we happened to have moved into the same apartment complex. lucky for me, he had managed to find himself a girlfriend over the summer, and i was home free. in fact, when i tried to be nice, and say hello, he pretended like he had never met me.

so, that's my worst date. what's yours? i would love to know!


Lindsey said...

My worst date ever was a last-minute blind date to the homecoming dance. The plan was to have a bbq before the dance. He got so caught up in getting the bbq going that he didn't think to come pick me up until the bbq was over. So when I got there, all that was left was a tiny, burnt hamburger patty. All the buns were gone and the condiments had been packed away, so my date ran off to his apartment to get me a piece of bread and some ketchup. To make a long story short, the date only got worse, so when the date was said and done, I did my best to avoid him. This worked for a few years, but a few months ago he and his wife moved into my ward. :) It's awkward.

elise said...

haha! lindsey, that sounds terrible! sometimes i'm baffled by what must be going on in people's heads (if anything).

Ace and Waleena...Two people, actually said...

My worst date was also a last minute blind date in HS. I was supposed to be going out with someone I has seen a picture of but at the last minute, apparently, he canceled out, but there was another guy that needed a date, so I said I would go. He was unattractive, brought me a huge orchid corsage that hardly fit on my dress (this was to a formal New Years Eve dance) and took me to the dance that was for the adults, not the teenagers (he was older then I) at church so people like my Bishop came dancing by! I was so humiliated! Then he tried to kiss me at midnight. Ick! This was the worst and I have barely gotten over it to this day! J.

justin said...

I went on a date with this waitress who worked at a restaurant in Lorton. She wrote her number on my check which was flattering because usually that's not how it works and I liked her tattoo sleeves. The only thing I knew about her was she was 28 and referenced having some kind of monetary "debt" she was dealing with.

I pick her up for the date and her mood is distant to the point of being comatose. She reveals being depressed at dinner and I ask why, and she tells me she recently got a DUI and she has a suspended license. A cop apparently pulled her over after running her tags and he had her car impounded. The cherry on top was when she told me she has a breathalyzer for her car that she has to blow into to get the car started by blowing under the limit.

Okay, people make mistakes. I've made mistakes in my life (although not with the law) and I've grown to be one not to be judgemental, so I just brush it off and continue conversation.

As it goes on, I find out dad isn't in the picture, mom is apparently a mean alcoholic who is drunk all the time, she used to smoke weed almost everyday, but is "over it" now. Used to be in rehab. Currently in state mandated AA. The debt is paying for these classes, legal fees, and other fines for her DUI. All of this is a little intimidating to say the least, but pobably the worst part happened was when she said she read a lot too when I said I was an English major and the only things she read was Star Wars fiction.

Throughout dinner she keeps apologizing for her mood, that she is having a good time, but she's bi polar. She doesn't take her medication because she "feels fine", and all this leads to her discussion of her manic episodes. Oh, one episode has led her to begin writing her autobiography.

All of this is pretty bad, but not necessarily a total deal breaker. I'm not exactly mr perfect and I've known a lot of people who needed medication.

Well, on her left arm which doesn't have any tattoos she has a bunch of scars which looks like a cat got to a toilet paper roll. I ask her if she's okay and she tells me she used to cut herself. And her last serious relationship was also with someone who cut themselves and they used to enable each other. Pretty depressing stuff.

Then she tells me the tattoo on the back of her thigh is a picture of a key hole that covers her entire back thigh and inside the key hole is a look into her bathroom with her lying naked and cutting her wrists and there's blood everywhere.

Then to top it all off, she used to live in my neighborhood, unbeknownst to me, for a long time and used to babysit my ex-girlfriend who was my neighbor and with whom I had a terribly abusive 5-year relationship/hook-up/constant fighting "experience". Oh, and her mom is still friends with my ex's mother who hates my guts.

Oh, and my friend Gretchen was at the restaurant this girl waited tables at with one of her coworkers. Turns out the waitress was my friend Gretchen's coworker's drug dealer.

Top that.

elise said...

So...did you go on a second date?

justin said...

Nah, I passed. Us crazy kids probably could've made it, though. It's a shame.